Success and Failure
and at long last a stolen moment to write!
It's been a hot minute since I have had time; not that I haven't been writing and creating - I have indeed! Program content; however amazing, leaves little room for creative flair; and so here I am to dance with an idea that struck me this afternoon!
Success or Failure ... it's the standard by which we measure all the little things we do everyday that add up to our life as a whole!
Did I pass the test, complete the course, finish the job, or not?
Success or Failure is very black and white, very much like scientific data; and for some people those rigid guidelines are motivating, and a necessary evil in their perception of themselves ... for me ... not so much...
I like to colour outside the lines and still feel connected. I sometimes learn enough, by just showing up that I don't actually have to participate! Understanding that about myself is how I measure success in a multitude of ways; and in doing so have eliminated failure from my life!
Like most people I don't like to fail; but that isn't why I work so hard at this mindset of mine, the reality is when you are mindful, and choose to live in gratitude; success shows up in many different ways; ways that could look like failure to the untrained eye!
What if you opened yourself up to more ways that things could possibly turn out, what if you thought about more 'successful' outcomes, and what if you took it a step further and considered that even the worst imaginable outcome would offer you a learning experience ... success!
You set out to drop 20 lbs; to do that you start working out, you make better choices nutritionally, and you stick with these new habits but only loose 10 lbs; you are sleeping better, have more energy, and are learning to love yourself for who you are, rather than who you think you need to be ... have you failed?
Technically by setting that 20lb end game, yes you fell short in the rigid forum of success or failure; but what if you weren't so specific in your expectations, what if you were open to many different outcomes; the work is the same - you need to move, and you need to change your nutritional habits, but you do it because you know in terms of your health, it's the right thing to do ... any weight loss or better health that would arise from that work and those changes would be a success with no numerical expectation of weight loss! Right? Nothing changed except your perceived expectation!
What I have learned over the last couple of years, and most specifically this passed year is that I need to live less from expectations, and more from intentions. My goal setting needs to come from a place of authentic self improvement, rather than expectations set by society! When I am making changes, I am doing so with the overall intention to improve my life; not be a certain size, or fit into a trendy lifestyle label.
When you move yourself onto a path of always making the 'next right' choice, for you; you move yourself into the success fast lane! No matter what the outcome; if I showed up, did my best, and learned something - even if that something was that I didn't like the path I was on - I am living successfully. It sounds simple, and I have been accused of lowering the bar so that no matter what I can feel good ... not true, the bar is in the same place, I have just opened myself to a variety of ways to get by it!
There are of course still disappointments, things that I wanted, or hoped to accomplish that didn't come to fruition; but it's only a failure when I stop trying! Successful living tells me that perhaps I could make an adjustment, or take a different approach to get where I think I need to be; but it also tells me that sometimes where I end up is different than where I hoped; but exactly where I needed to be!
Be open, be honest and be real .... stay curious and get creative; crush expectations with intention and success is yours for the taking!
It's been a hot minute since I have had time; not that I haven't been writing and creating - I have indeed! Program content; however amazing, leaves little room for creative flair; and so here I am to dance with an idea that struck me this afternoon!
Success or Failure ... it's the standard by which we measure all the little things we do everyday that add up to our life as a whole!
Did I pass the test, complete the course, finish the job, or not?
Success or Failure is very black and white, very much like scientific data; and for some people those rigid guidelines are motivating, and a necessary evil in their perception of themselves ... for me ... not so much...
I like to colour outside the lines and still feel connected. I sometimes learn enough, by just showing up that I don't actually have to participate! Understanding that about myself is how I measure success in a multitude of ways; and in doing so have eliminated failure from my life!
Like most people I don't like to fail; but that isn't why I work so hard at this mindset of mine, the reality is when you are mindful, and choose to live in gratitude; success shows up in many different ways; ways that could look like failure to the untrained eye!
What if you opened yourself up to more ways that things could possibly turn out, what if you thought about more 'successful' outcomes, and what if you took it a step further and considered that even the worst imaginable outcome would offer you a learning experience ... success!
You set out to drop 20 lbs; to do that you start working out, you make better choices nutritionally, and you stick with these new habits but only loose 10 lbs; you are sleeping better, have more energy, and are learning to love yourself for who you are, rather than who you think you need to be ... have you failed?
Technically by setting that 20lb end game, yes you fell short in the rigid forum of success or failure; but what if you weren't so specific in your expectations, what if you were open to many different outcomes; the work is the same - you need to move, and you need to change your nutritional habits, but you do it because you know in terms of your health, it's the right thing to do ... any weight loss or better health that would arise from that work and those changes would be a success with no numerical expectation of weight loss! Right? Nothing changed except your perceived expectation!
What I have learned over the last couple of years, and most specifically this passed year is that I need to live less from expectations, and more from intentions. My goal setting needs to come from a place of authentic self improvement, rather than expectations set by society! When I am making changes, I am doing so with the overall intention to improve my life; not be a certain size, or fit into a trendy lifestyle label.
When you move yourself onto a path of always making the 'next right' choice, for you; you move yourself into the success fast lane! No matter what the outcome; if I showed up, did my best, and learned something - even if that something was that I didn't like the path I was on - I am living successfully. It sounds simple, and I have been accused of lowering the bar so that no matter what I can feel good ... not true, the bar is in the same place, I have just opened myself to a variety of ways to get by it!
There are of course still disappointments, things that I wanted, or hoped to accomplish that didn't come to fruition; but it's only a failure when I stop trying! Successful living tells me that perhaps I could make an adjustment, or take a different approach to get where I think I need to be; but it also tells me that sometimes where I end up is different than where I hoped; but exactly where I needed to be!
Be open, be honest and be real .... stay curious and get creative; crush expectations with intention and success is yours for the taking!
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