New Years Eve musings...
T minus 12 hours as I sit down to write this post; 12 hours of 2016 remaining! The holiday season is pretty much a blur, it has passed so quickly - peacefully and filled with joy; that's a huge bonus! One I am taking as a sign of things to come!
The days leading up to Christmas have always been filled with anxiety for me; worry about forgetting a gift, or not getting everything done have always gotten in the way of my ability to relax, and really enjoy the moments... happily; not this year!
Of course there is always a little extra stress in the planning, but I decided months ago that however things played out; that was how it was supposed to be; and I would be grateful! Turns out I saw people I wasn't expecting to see, and was able to enjoy every minute as it unfolded!
If Christmas is my anxiety kick; then New Years is my anticipation rush! For several years now I have been doing a Year over Year analysis of my life at New Years... kind of like all those amazing high light reel videos that have been surfacing for the past week! It's a truly humbling experience to really look at everything that you accomplish in a year ... and just in case you were thinking nothing had changed, it's a great reminder that no matter what life throws at you, your success rate of surviving it all is currently 100%!
2015 literally kicked my butt! There was so much trauma, my life, and my heart were torn open, and tossed in every direction. It was my wake up call; it was painful to look at all the pieces and realize that I hadn't really been living! Every relationship, every aspect of my life was in question; and it was all overwhelming; but I realized I couldn't just keep saying 'I'm fine'! I wasn't fine, and what was happening in my life wasn't fine - it was time for me to wake up, let go, and move on!
2016 was about healing, sifting through the rubble, and deciding how to put the pieces back together! Painful? Kind of an understatement! It was excruciating, but necessary! This passed year my entire life has been rescripted! Every relationship that I have carried forward from the rubble is different, I am different! The relationships that were left behind; were left behind with gratitude for the lessons they provided, not guilt, or regret, just gratitude!
The healing didn't happen by accident; looking back over the year I am not looking back over a series of happy coincidences - I am looking back over the end result of intentions that at this time last year I set! I used to create endless lists of resolutions; because I thought that's what I should do and there were always 10 lbs to be lost... last year in the midst of all the hurt and disappointment I decided to set intentions instead; I decided that if I was calling 2015 my year of trauma, then the theme for 2016 was going to be healing, and I was going to do things on purpose that would support that healing!
Healing is a slow and often painful process; and to that end it was a fitting intention! My goals were to find new ways to have relationships that didn't hurt, a new way to pursue my career path that better served my philosophies, and to that end I brought everything home! There were a lot of drastic changes; but closing the studio space was the biggest risk I took! A risk that has turned out better than even I could have hoped!
So this year as I reflect, and of course look forward I am beyond grateful for the support that friends, family and clients have shown me over the past year. It hasn't been easy to be around me I'm sure, as I put the pieces back together things were barely recognizable; but for those who have shared this journey with me you can see that I am exactly where I needed to be - and I thank you for your patience as I figured that out! To my husband; (who reads these blogs because I signed him up as a subscriber LOL) thank you for always having my back, for believing in me when I didn't, and loving me at my most unlovable.. you are an amazing human, and to say you are my person feels totally inadequate; but you are my person!
I have decided that 2017 is my year of growth! Now that I am firmly rooted in this new place; I need, and want to grow! The beauty of healing is that it brings about new hope, strength, and confidence that you are on your way... and that's exactly how I am feeling today as I prepare to celebrate this time honoured tradition of ringing in the New Year!
My growth begins next weekend; with the continuation of my Registered Yoga Teaching 200 training! You might say that my yoga teacher training late in 2016 was like finding the missing piece in my life! This training has brought together all of my beliefs and practices, and makes me feel whole! I am beyond excited for the next 6 months of training, not only for myself, but for how it will enhance my program for all of you!
I have come to realize that my healing and my growth are not only what is best for me; everything we do to make ourselves better has a direct impact on the lives of those we love who are sharing our path! When we are happy, and fulfilled in who we are; everyone we come in contact with benefits from that; and is hopefully inspired to find that for themselves!
So tonight when the clock strikes 12:00 I will send my intentions out to 2017 for myself; and I will also send a wish that everyone I share space with in 2017, will find healing through my growth! I look forward to continuing to support everyone's health and wellness here 'At Home'!
Cheers to 2017! Where ever you are in your personal journey; set your intentions, create your theme, and live your life on purpose! You didn't come this far, to only come this far!
The days leading up to Christmas have always been filled with anxiety for me; worry about forgetting a gift, or not getting everything done have always gotten in the way of my ability to relax, and really enjoy the moments... happily; not this year!
Of course there is always a little extra stress in the planning, but I decided months ago that however things played out; that was how it was supposed to be; and I would be grateful! Turns out I saw people I wasn't expecting to see, and was able to enjoy every minute as it unfolded!
If Christmas is my anxiety kick; then New Years is my anticipation rush! For several years now I have been doing a Year over Year analysis of my life at New Years... kind of like all those amazing high light reel videos that have been surfacing for the past week! It's a truly humbling experience to really look at everything that you accomplish in a year ... and just in case you were thinking nothing had changed, it's a great reminder that no matter what life throws at you, your success rate of surviving it all is currently 100%!
2015 literally kicked my butt! There was so much trauma, my life, and my heart were torn open, and tossed in every direction. It was my wake up call; it was painful to look at all the pieces and realize that I hadn't really been living! Every relationship, every aspect of my life was in question; and it was all overwhelming; but I realized I couldn't just keep saying 'I'm fine'! I wasn't fine, and what was happening in my life wasn't fine - it was time for me to wake up, let go, and move on!
2016 was about healing, sifting through the rubble, and deciding how to put the pieces back together! Painful? Kind of an understatement! It was excruciating, but necessary! This passed year my entire life has been rescripted! Every relationship that I have carried forward from the rubble is different, I am different! The relationships that were left behind; were left behind with gratitude for the lessons they provided, not guilt, or regret, just gratitude!
The healing didn't happen by accident; looking back over the year I am not looking back over a series of happy coincidences - I am looking back over the end result of intentions that at this time last year I set! I used to create endless lists of resolutions; because I thought that's what I should do and there were always 10 lbs to be lost... last year in the midst of all the hurt and disappointment I decided to set intentions instead; I decided that if I was calling 2015 my year of trauma, then the theme for 2016 was going to be healing, and I was going to do things on purpose that would support that healing!
 |
| Dismantling the studio space! |
So this year as I reflect, and of course look forward I am beyond grateful for the support that friends, family and clients have shown me over the past year. It hasn't been easy to be around me I'm sure, as I put the pieces back together things were barely recognizable; but for those who have shared this journey with me you can see that I am exactly where I needed to be - and I thank you for your patience as I figured that out! To my husband; (who reads these blogs because I signed him up as a subscriber LOL) thank you for always having my back, for believing in me when I didn't, and loving me at my most unlovable.. you are an amazing human, and to say you are my person feels totally inadequate; but you are my person!
I have decided that 2017 is my year of growth! Now that I am firmly rooted in this new place; I need, and want to grow! The beauty of healing is that it brings about new hope, strength, and confidence that you are on your way... and that's exactly how I am feeling today as I prepare to celebrate this time honoured tradition of ringing in the New Year!
My growth begins next weekend; with the continuation of my Registered Yoga Teaching 200 training! You might say that my yoga teacher training late in 2016 was like finding the missing piece in my life! This training has brought together all of my beliefs and practices, and makes me feel whole! I am beyond excited for the next 6 months of training, not only for myself, but for how it will enhance my program for all of you!
 |
| Yoga Teacher Training... assisted stretching! |
I have come to realize that my healing and my growth are not only what is best for me; everything we do to make ourselves better has a direct impact on the lives of those we love who are sharing our path! When we are happy, and fulfilled in who we are; everyone we come in contact with benefits from that; and is hopefully inspired to find that for themselves!
So tonight when the clock strikes 12:00 I will send my intentions out to 2017 for myself; and I will also send a wish that everyone I share space with in 2017, will find healing through my growth! I look forward to continuing to support everyone's health and wellness here 'At Home'!
Cheers to 2017! Where ever you are in your personal journey; set your intentions, create your theme, and live your life on purpose! You didn't come this far, to only come this far!
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